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What's Your Rupture?

Endless Scroll

by BODEGA

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credits

released July 6, 2018

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Track Name: How Did This Happen?!
It’s new world now. Don’t discriminate.
Everyone is equally a master and a slave.
How did this happen?!

I see you walk past the demonstration.
Two chips on your shoulder.
You’re a culture connoisseur and your pain is real.
Two chips on your shoulder.
Stuck wading through a crowd of radical daughters.
Barricades armed by empty strollers.
Basic slogans to combat controllers.
See them dance from afar to guitar on your shoulder
As you smugly walk past.
Think: These people should be here regardless of outcome.
As you smugly walk past.
Think: There’s a half-off sale at the Barnes and Noble.

As you smugly walk past you ask yourself how did this happen?

You’re cueing deep cuts as you glide escalator.
Two chips on your shoulder.
Face pressed to glass looking down at the mass march.
Two cans on your shoulder.
Your playlist knows you better than a closest lover.
Your playlist always desert island disk.
Your playlist will curate you songs of the oppressed.
Look at the marquee in 1080p.
As you smugly walk past.
Think: These people should be here regardless of outcome.
As you smugly walk past.
Think: It’s an island of blue. It’s a nipple in water.

As you smugly walk past you ask yourself how did this happen?

It’s new world now. Don’t discriminate.
Everyone is equally a master and a slave.

As you smugly walk past you ask yourself how did this happen?

This machine you know it don’t kill fascists.
This machine just softens what’s hard.
This machine it killed the dream of the sixties.
This machine you know it’s just a guitar.
Track Name: Bodega Birth
Endless scroll
Roll out the endless scroll
And the river has an endless roll
Roll out the endless, endless

Enter Bodega:
This is documentary
All day long stare at screen
This is documentary

I fell in love staring at screen
Triple dots I see bouncing
Name lights up, my heart will beat
That was documentary
Born into by what consumes
Love is born but does consume
Bay will burn, my heart will beat
That was documentary

Enter Bodega:
This is documentary
Press record, message received
This is documentary

Time to return Bodega:
Witness documentary
Flesh and mind shall be released
All is documentary

I fell in love, I stare at screen
Triple dots I see bouncing
Two K's seen, my heart will beat
That was documentary
Empty bottle, feel free
That was documentary
All you touch, all you see, all your life will ever be
Track Name: Name Escape
Name escape
Right now :name escape.

"Did you remember the Fender?"
Said a familiar beard
Whose band I always see
Whose sound I never hear
I cannot seem to place his face
His nose or his shape
Right now, name escape

Right now ---> name escape.

And I've seen him at Palisades closing out tabs
I've seen him outside of metros flagging down cabs
Hand on the fender, message from sender
I've seen his face but now no name remember
And online he's typing with a pseudonym
So even messaging I'm not quite sure if it's him
And he never once makes eye contact
When he talks he never once makes eye contact
And I have no idea what he does for a living
And I can't distinguish his head from the next
His pants are much tighter than the last time we met
He's got a pizza-core badge which he bought on the internet

Well have I heard the latest something about so and so?
No I have not, my son. Now I don't want to know
Have you heard the latest single by the so and the so's?
No I have not, my son. Now I don't want to know

Right now name escape.

And I wonder what this head looks like when he's fucking?
Does he look any less like a ship lost at sea?
Does he flop like a fish dropped down on the deck?
And does he still ever once make eye contact?
His head's over the shoulder
His head's on the pillow
His head's over the shoulder
He's looking at the stage
He's like me and you and her and also Johnny B. Goode
We're just fading and waiting for the time we will play
Now luckily a face walks up from back in the day
But even him I can't place
So right now name escape

Right now my hard drive's erased
Right now I've ran out of mind space
Right now we talk about the sound space
Right now heaven knows I'm miserable now
Right now heaven knows I'm missing you now

And I'm not sure I ever knew your face in the first place
And I'm sure not you ever placed first in the new face
And I'm sure not I ever not knew not your first place
And I'm not sure I ever not knew not your first face escape

Name escape name escape name escape name escape
Scape scape scape scape scape scape scape
Track Name: Boxes For the Move
After work I packed my desktop and went out for a-walkin'
The closest liquor store had just ran out of boxes
So I went down to Bogart to get more cardboard boxes for the move

As I wished that I could drink what was once sold in these boxes
The sky started to rain and my guts felt nauseous
Cause I couldn't tell you that my heart had been starting to move

Had to struggle down the road with fifteen soggy boxes
The rope had cut my skin and the boxes I kept dropping, yeah
I'm boxing out my best friend
At least I'll do a good job for the move
I'm lying to my best friend
At least I'll do a good job for the move

When I came home you were sleeping surrounded by boxes
Read a Christmas card from you and put it in my pocket
Hid a picture of the two of you
You were sitting smiling in a photo booth

As I tiptoed round the couch, tripped, ripped lamp out of socket
I was stacking til the sun rose, couldn't stop packing boxes
It dawned on me abruptly as I emptied out all contents from the room

And I thought back to the time when were both sick
And I held on to your hand in the back of ambulance
Now I'm holding onto masking taping up these boxes for the move
Now I'm wearing lots of masks and taping up these boxes for the move
And you know I hate to make you cry so now I'm taping up these boxes for the move
Track Name: I Am Not A Cinephile
I am not a cinephile
I am not a cinephile, motherfucker
I am not a cinephile
I am not a cinephile, motherfucker

Look to the screen for inspiration
How to live a richer life
Just how to collect and categorize
Get down on my knees and the light hits my eyes

But I am not a cinephile
I am not a cinephile, motherfucker
I am not a cinephile
I am not a cinephile, motherfucker

Don't count frames
Don't memorize names
Don't seek divinity in Hollywood shame
Yeah my eyes are cameras and I am recording
Yeah my eyes are cameras and I am still speeding
But I am not a cinephile.
Track Name: Can't Knock The Hustle
Serving gluten free water with sugar in square of Union.
Nine dollars an hour.
Co-worker puts on Top 40 crap to tune in.
Nine dollars for a smoothie.
I say ‘Hey Steven can we please try something better?’
Nine samples on the counter.
He said that we must study and learn from higher power.
Cause you can’t knock the hustle.
When the cats are making capital.
You can’t knock the hustle.

Selling gluten free water with sugar in square of Union.
Nine dollars an hour.
White middle management comes in to check on the scooping.
Nine dollars for a smoothie
They say ‘Please Steven smile and can we sample forever?’
Nine samples on the counter.
They said that you must study and learn from higher power.
Cause you can’t knock the hustle.
When the cats are making capital.
You can’t knock the hustle.
The cats are making capital.
Track Name: Gyrate
Gy Gy Gy. Gy Gy Gy. Gy Gy Gy. Gy Gy Gyrate.

Knuckles on the mound with the weight of the ground. If I don’t let this go it’ll happen now. I’ve been taking care of myself since I was six years old. Secret to my success is to gyrate it.

In the middle of a party. In the middle of the floor. You can get it all out right now. Wiggle your ass around. Feel the vibes coming up through your toes. Let it all go. You must have to gyrate it.

Gyrate.
Track Name: Jack In Titanic
Well no on is as salty as the seven seas except me and Jack in Titanic.
And no one is as handsome or quite as poor as me ‘cept Jack in Titanic.
And no ones dances, writes, or fights, or fucks, or makes love quite like me except Jack in Titanic.
And no one sees your blazer jacket falls on your hips like I see ‘cept Jack in Titanic.

And when we were young we could see me barrel roll over Jeeps. And I learned to fall off from that steep. So now I partner police and fight for you and me and Jack in Titanic.

Well no one knows the cure for feral deadly disease except me and Jack in Titanic.
And no one is as open but still firm in beliefs quite like me except Jack in Titanic.
And I’ll tell you that no one shows devotion when they’re down on their knees quite like me except maybe Jack in Titanic.
And no one sees your state of grace with light through the leaves like I see except Jack in Titanic.

And when we were young we could see me barrel roll through the fleets. I learned to nod off by that screen. So now I fall asleep and dream of you and me and Jack in Titanic.
Track Name: Margot
Watching privately with a lens
Can't tell in this business
What theory or fetish you're fighting against

Hey Margot, sad existence you're living
You sold the idea of touching and healing
An idea you might have once believed in
That's an idea you might have once believed in

Living alone by the phone with no one to blame
Yet you gave me my name
Tell me, what do you believe in?
I've no idea what you still believe in

Hey Margot, sad existence you're living
You sold the idea of touching and healing
An idea you might have once believed in
That's an idea you might have once believed in

That's an idea you might have once believed in?
That an idea I might have once believed in.
Track Name: Bookmarks
Every morning when I wake up
Same clicks to the same sites every day
Same things go in my body
Same thoughts fill my brain

And so often I forget what I'm trying to accomplish
Bookmarks to myself keep my eyes on the mission
Eyes on the mission, yeah
The mission
Eyes on the mission, yeah

All day at work, stare at computer
Come home from work, stare at computer
Do my own work, stare at computer
Rest and relax, stare at computer
With the ones and the zeros, stare at computer
The ones go in the zeros, stare at computer
Mother nature is ones and zeros, stare at computer
When I die and meet my maker I will stare at computer

And I refresh to not forget what I'm trying to accomplish
Write notes to myself, keep my eyes on the mission
Eyes on the mission, yeah
The mission
Eyes on the mission, yeah

All day at work, stare at computer
Come home from work, stare at computer
Do my own work, stare at computer
I'm reading an article at work, stare at computer
A Japanese boy in Odaiba, stares at computer
Has a seizure playing Pokemon, stare at computer
Seventy two hours of gameplay, stare at computer
When he dies and meets his maker he will stare at computer

And I back up to not forget what I'm trying to accomplish
Write marks on myself to keep my eyes on the mission
Eyes on the mission, yeah
The mission
Eyes on the mission, yeah
Track Name: Warhol
This is the philosophy of A. War
Philosophy of A. War

Andy said the best artist was businessman
And the best businessman is a cold blood killer
So it follows that the best artists are killers too
If you see a man dying note the color of his blood
And snap a picture
Snap a picture
Snap a picture

Form against everything
Everybody hurts and is against everything
Shape against everything
Have you heard of me?
Well then I guess you've heard of everything

Form against everything
Everybody hurts and is against everything
The scroll it is against everything
Search for stimulation playing dumb against everything

Yeah you can snap a picture
Track Name: Charlie
I heard footsteps and you were right there in my room
We met through the song and we lived through the tune
You said "Lately I've been trying to live outside of the dream"
But I never really knew what that was supposed to mean

Remember when we had an invisible band?
You played invisible bass guitar
I clutched invisible mic stand
We said we'd always float high
We'd always be free
But we never really knew what that was supposed to mean

I was standing on the lawn on that New Year's Eve
As your body washed up from the river you were covered in leaves
"In My Life" I would play on repeat
In the lot next to the park that you were buried beneath

When I got back home from The Lion's Den
I was fucked up on paint fumes, I was frayed, I was spent
On that Staten Island Ferry I was with you my friend
I see your face in the river
I am with you my friend

And the last time that I saw you was an empty room
You showed up halfway through the set and then you left with a tune
Now lately I've been trying to live outside of the dream
But I never really knew what that was supposed to mean.
Track Name: Williamsburg Bridge
Well if you're telling me that freedom exists
I guess I could make it over that bridge
At the halfway point you showed me half your chest
Well mine's never beat faster than this
Mine's never beat faster than this

I saw eighteen ants down lounging with a laugh
On a log that led to a condo of glass
Well my knees were shaking at the open space
And view of practice space from the past
View of practice space from the past

I saw the ferry that we boated to Ellis
Saw your heritage in stone on the shelf
They flocked to this rock for the freedom to roam
Now history's repeating itself
Yeah, history's repeating itself

I stretched the rectangle just to crop him out
Of a window opened in incognito
We cropped me and you out the circle we grew
Clicked the red dot like the blood of mosquito
Dot red like the blood of mosquito

I see how you can change become something you're not
You block the entrance to your bridge and retire
Well learning what it's like to have something to lose
Is learning what it's like to desire
Learning what it's like to desire

Well I'm sure today that freedom exists
I feel it shaking from the top of that bridge
I've been told I'm now opposed to my old points of view
But mine's never seen further than this
Mine's never seen further than this
Track Name: Truth Is Not Punishment
I visited my mother in a Tampa Bay complex
Klonopin and vodka all day
She was pulling on bottles
No pull to eat
Strapped inside of cathode rays
What was most sad of all is that you didn't want to leave your imprisonment
You said that "I'm happy"
I was arrogant I said that you weren't
Smoke billowed through the screen door slide
I stared at my computer to escape from the night
You asked me advice so I wrote you a lie
I typed, "Truth is not punishment"
Truth is not punishment.

I visited a writer with anxiety complex
Depression meds to last through the same
Prescribed in bottles, shown on TV
Cost as much as eighteen plays
On his TV flat screen with the porcupine dream of the essay
Where a man and his dream let loose on caffeine see it only one way
And "Pain rings true" said the pen to the knife
And what rings true is what a pen wants from life
Said "I used to want to die just to prove I was right"
No one told me truth is not punishment
Truth is not punishment.

I visited my lover in an hourly hospice
I've yearned for you on pixel display
I'm always pulling on bottles
No pull to eat
And cannot find the words to say
Except what is most sad of all is that I never want to leave my imprisonment
You said that "I'm happy" but I know you and I know that you aren't
That's when the words they started to fly
Weight took off there and opened me wide
Took a smell of her perfume and a glance in her eye
To learn truth is not punishment
Truth is not punishment.

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